LJ has all ten Friends seasons on DVD

KANSAS CITY, MO — Wide receiver Dwayne Bowe of the Kansas City Chiefs was surprised to notice a DVD collection that includes all ten seasons of Friends when he visited running back Larry Johnson’s house.

“There they were – all there, all ten seasons, right between Scarface and Goodfellas,” Bowe said. “It’s hard to miss … The thing takes up like two feet. Friends was pretty unbelievably prolific.”

According to Bowe, LJ initially claimed that the DVDs actually belong to his girlfriend, Julissa Bermudez. “But he told me that she had been on the road for the past few weeks, and when he opened the DVD player, season three was in there. You know, when Ross and Rachel are getting together. Or are they breaking up? Anyway, season three, disc two.”

LJ, when prodded by Bowe, reluctantly admitted that indeed the DVDs were his, and then proceeded to give the rookie wideout a detailed analysis of why Friends is funny. Johnson later recounted what he calls “The Ross Theory” for SSNN.

“See, Ross is kind of the odd man out,” LJ said. “You have the three hot chicks. You have Chandler and Joey – everyone loves them. And then you have Ross. The black sheep. The butt of all the jokes. But Ross is the straw that stirs the drink, man. If you look at that show, a lot of that stuff wouldn’t be funny without Ross. He’s the straightman, and that ain’t easy. David Schwimmer is an inspiration to me.”

Bowe “really started to get the willies” when LJ compared himself (favorably) to Ross Geller. “I see myself as sort of the Ross of the Chiefs,” LJ said. “A lot of people don’t think I’m that funny, that I’m just kind of there. I’ve even heard people say that my success is based on the system. Not true – I’m at least as talented as David Schwimmer, and neither one of us are system backs, if you know what I’m saying.”

Bowe said he and LJ proceeded to watch three episodes of the show before they fell asleep on the couch.

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!