Corso bravely picks Ohio State while being attacked by Nittany Lion

COLLEGE STATION, PA — ESPN College GameDay announcer Lee Corso boldly announced that he was picking the Ohio State Buckeyes to win their showdown with Penn State today, even while he apparently was being attacked by a Nittany Lion perched on his head.

“The rumors that you are hearing are true,” said Kirk Herbstreit, one of Corso’s co-hosts. “I was sitting right there next to Lee the whole day, and from the moment he showed up until the moment he left, he had what appeared to be a nittany lion attached to the top of his head.”

A review of the videotape of the GameDay broadcast indicates that indeed Corso did have a small but extremely aggressive nittany lion viciously embedded in his scalp for the entire broadcast. The lion, whose gray and white fur was remarkably repellent to the wind and other natural effects present during the outdoor broadcast, resolutely sucked blood from Corso’s brain as the telecast went on.

“Look, I was a little nervous that the nittany lion was going to attack me when I picked the Ohio State University,” Herbstreit said. “But I guess that two things were at play. First, I think it understood that I am a Buckeye, and that I wasn’t picking Ohio State for any other reason than foolish allegiance. Second, I feel like it was having a pretty good meal on Corso’s blood and brain matter throughout the broadcast. After all, how else can you explain the steady decline in intelligence of all his comments throughout the telecast? By the end, he’s just screaming words and putting together random phrases that don’t make any sense. But I guess that’s what a three-hour Nittany Lion attack will do to you.”