Manning sick of seeing self on TV

INDIANAPOLIS, IN — You probably aren’t counting, but Peyton Manning has appeared in only 17 commercials during this NFL season. This is a serious cutback from last year’s football season, where he appeared in a record 26. A very serious Manning finally explained his reduced acting role after a Monday morning walk-through.

“There was a point where I said to myself, ‘I want to see LT, Urlacher, or Brady. They’re funny too!’ I was just sick of myself,” said a disgusted Manning. “You look in the mirror, you see yourself; you turn on the TV, you see yourself. It starts to get emotionally exhausting.”

To combat the Manning phenomenon, Peyton decided to roll back the amount of commercials he will appear in this year.

“I had to decline so many good offers. Tinactin offered me a sweet spot, but I just couldn’t put myself on TV any more,” Manning explained. “Tinactin! The tough actin’ variety that Madden once sponsored! You know? Boom! Tough actin’ Tinactin – but I had to say no.”

Steve Johannsen of TMG marketing was disappointed in the QB’s decision. He thought Manning would be the perfect pitch man to sponsor Milton Bradley board games before hearing the news.

“I was sitting right here on my couch when I got the call. I just started crying,” a visibly inebriated Johannsen told SSNN. “They said Eli was willing and able. Eli? He’s not funny. This could cost me my job.”

Tony Dungy also expressed disappointment in his star quarterback. He never thought Manning would turn down a challenge. Dungy released a statement in which he addressed the concern of overexposure.

“There are lots of people who are way overplayed right now. Tiger Woods is a prime example. Tiger is in more commercials than Peyton right now. That doesn’t stop Tiger from doing more commercials, and Tiger’s not even funny. Next time you see Peyton, ask him to do his impression of Borat. God, he’s dead on!”

Apparently not everyone is suffering from Manning’s decision, as evidenced by Joan Cusack’s reaction: “Peyton stopped doing commercials? Sweet, I might get some more work.”

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!