17,000 morons realize they had wrong Adrian Peterson

USA — Thousands of complete morons checked their fantasy teams with expectant glee Sunday afternoon, only to realize that they’d drafted or picked up the wrong Adrian Peterson, selecting the Bears backup running back instead of the Vikings rookie phenom.

The rookie Adrian Peterson rushed for 103 yards and added a 60-yard TD reception, putting together a 22.3-point day in an average fantasy format. In the meantime, the not good Adrian Peterson had 38 yards rushing and lost a fumble while giving the also-bad Cedric Benson a breather.

In some cases, these fantasy-owning buffoons were duped into selecting the wrong Peterson, as was the case with Michael Montanez, who realizes now why everyone was laughing when he bid $24 for Peterson in his office league auction. In other cases, it was an honest mistake, and in at least one league the mistaken owner has been granted the right to drop and replace the player without consequence.

“I just took the position that if he’s dumb enough to grab the Whoopi Goldberg-looking Adrian Peterson off waivers, we can afford to give him a mulligan,” said Andy Franklin – commissioner of the Yahoo! league Step Up to Get Ya’ Rep Up – referring to Danny Sellinger and his squad, D’s Nutz. “Danny doesn’t really watch football anyway, so he’s pretty much assured of last place. He told me he’s thinking of picking up Charlie Frye to replace Peterson.”

Rupert Michelin, 23, of Des Moines, Iowa, took his embarrassing mistake in stride. “Every team has its ups and downs in the season,” Michelin said. “Maybe next week I’ll accidentally pick up someone who is freakin’ awesome. You never know.”