Greg Maddux seeking guest appearance on Flight of the Conchords

SAN DIEGO–Greg Maddux has apparently threatened to fire his agent if he’s not granted a guest appearance on HBO’s cult hit Flight of the Conchords before the conclusion of the first season.

Maddux apparently has left 22 phone messages for his agent over the course of the summer, several of which simply contain the 42-year old pitcher crooning “Brown paper, white paper,” from the Conchords song “Tape of Love.”

Conchords, a show about a folk-rock duo from New Zealand, stars two would-be rock stars who are trying to make it in New York City. “I relate to these guys,” Maddux said. “What they’re going through in New York is an awful lot like what I was going through in Chicago. We are kindred spirits, I believe.”

Maddux has suggested three alternatives for his guest appearance:

* The Conchords get an agent, and it happens to be the same agent as Greg Maddux, and they pass in the hallway, and hijinks ensue.

* The Conchords are invited to throw out the first pitch at a baseball game at Shea Stadium, but due to the fact that they’re from New Zealand, they don’t know how to throw, so they enlist the help of Greg Maddux, and hijinks ensue.

* The Conchords get a gig playing in Cooperstown for the Hall of Fame weekend, on the weekend that Greg Maddux is being inducted to the Hall of Fame, and they meet there, when the Conchords sing a song about Maddux. The problem with this scenario is that Maddux, who intends to play at least one more season, will not be inducted to the Hall of Fame for at least six years, and is not sure that the Conchords will also be still around and in the popular consciousness then.

Nevertheless, Maddux is actively working on a song for that episode, and has constructed the lyrics (though no music).

“They call him the Mad Dog,
he pitches like a bad fog,
it’s tough to hit the ball,
if you can’t see it at all …”

No word from HBO as to whether the guest appearance will take place, but Bret is apparently very amenable.

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It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!