Owens to Release Second Book

DALLAS, TX — After having great success with the children’s book he released last year, Terrell Owens has wasted no time in announcing the release of a second book due out sometime this summer. T.O.’s Big Book of Poetry will be a collection of haikus Owens has written over the years, and many expect it to reveal an emotional side of the troubled receiver. Apparently Owens sees haiku as a stress reliever, and says it has helped him deal with the pressures of an NFL career. “This is a way for me to show people that I’m not just the greatest athlete the world has ever seen,” the five-time Pro Bowler said. “I want people to understand that behind this chiseled physique and god-like talent, I’m just a poet looking to bare my soul. Just like I’ve done with football, I’m going to take the poetry game to a whole new level. It’s gonna be hot.” In order to give people a taste of what he is capable of, Owens released a couple samples of his work to several media outlets, including SSNN.

Don’t get mad at me,
I’m not trying to drop it;
Blame the quarterback

I love me some me,
I can’t get enough of me;
Bring me a mirror

Much like Owens’ other extracurricular pursuits, this is sure to be a hot topic throughout the sports world. According to Owens, the book will also delve into some of the other issues that have put him in the headlines: gay quarterbacks, slow quarterbacks, dumb quarterbacks, dumb coaches, fat coaches, jealous teammates and at least one section completely dedicated to alligator arms.

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!