Florida struggling with success

GAINESVILLE, FL — The University of Florida is usually considered a football school, but with the basketball team winning back-to-back NCAA Championships, some are second guessing which sports team is the focal point. SSNN interviewed students on the Florida campus in the hopes of deciding, once and for all, which sports team the students consider to be the most important. John Jacobs, a sixth year senior, replied with a chuckle, “I think it’s the basketball team… no, maybe it’s the football team… actually, it could be the volleyball team. I don’t know - personally I prefer to watch the girls gymnastics squad.” With applications for admission up 16%, Florida’s Board of Education has been forced to turn away a much larger number of applicants. Many students believe that higher new admissions standards (including a rule which prohibits the acceptance of convicted felons) will degrade the quality of the Gators’ major athletics squads. Asked to comment on the new rules, head football coach Urban Meyer expressed similar concerns. “This is no good for our football team. What if we turn down the guy who could be our next big star? Lord knows Florida State will accept him.”

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!