Phil returning to old approach

AUGUSTA, GA — While golfers like Tiger Woods and Vijay Singh are living in the weight room in preparation for the beginning of golf’s “major” season, Phil Mickelson announced Friday that he will be taking some more time off. The news comes as a surprise to many, since Mickelson only just returned from a three-month hiatus after his memorable collapse at the 2006 U.S. Open. SSNN was on hand for Mickelson’s announcement, and caught up with Lefty after he announced his withdrawal from the Masters. “You know, I lost some weight and put on 15 pounds of muscle before I came back, and I thought it would make a difference,” the 2006 Masters champion told us. “Well, it hasn’t. Not in a good way, at least – I’m going to take some time to put all the water-weight back on. My game was a lot better when I was pudgy.” Mickelson went on to say that he’s taking the weight gain seriously, and is committed to making it happen. He’s planning to concentrate on the fast food diet – and you better believe he wants fries with that.

It’s going to be tough for this sport to sweep any nations, but it’s still pretty frickin’ cool!